Who knew it came in so many different varieties?
By Maggie Rascal
If only the spammers would listen, this is what I’d tell them…
Dear Purveyors of Canned Meat:
Thank you for your interest in our website. Because so many of you have left similar comments, we’ve put together a list of common observations, questions and concerns. Please consult this FAS (frequently added spam) guide before posting.
The Site Administrators
It’s thoughtful of you to be concerned about our SEO scores, Google ranking, social media marketing strategy and website layout. Really, though, we’re happy with how everything is going right now. We’ll keep your contact information on hand if we’re ever looking to make a change. Yup, it will be right there in its own special, circular file.
You have a lot of questions! Fortunately, the answers to most of them can be found easily, eliminating the need for us to post your comment that (coincidentally, we’re certain) leads to a site selling cheap shoes/purses/NFL jerseys/silicone wristbands. Here is the information you’re seeking: Continue reading
The Ghost Story, Frederick Smallfield (1829-1915)
“We need ghost stories because we, in fact, are the ghosts.”
~ Stephen King
Fear is a wonderful thing, in small doses. You ride the ghost train into the darkness, knowing that eventually the doors will open and you will step out into the daylight once again. It’s always reassuring to know that you’re still here, still safe. That nothing strange has happened, not really. It’s good to be a child again, for a little while, and to fear — not governments, not regulations, not infidelities or accountants or distant wars, but ghosts and such things that don’t exist, and even if they do, can do nothing to hurt us.
And this time of year is best for a haunting, as even the most prosaic things cast the most disquieting shadows.
~ Neil Gaiman
“We read scary stories so we can experience artificial situations of ‘fight or flight.’ These scenarios, whether real or imagined, get your body ready for action by giving you an extra dose of adrenaline. Your heart beat speeds up, your breathing increases and your blood pressure increases—in other words, it’s like an instant dose of caffeine combined with heavy exercise. You’re ready to leap over tall buildings in a single bound, although you may be screaming ‘Mommy!’ all the way.”
~ Merrie Destefano
By Bill Fullerton
This fictionalized memoir is based on the author’s personal experience. The names have been changed to protect the innocent and not-so-innocent.
Back when he’d been a kid, Mark Cahill’s mother often took him along when she and her sister went shopping. One of the familiar sights on these trips was an old, legless, blind man peddling pencils at a downtown street corner. That the man was blind hadn’t impressed Mark nearly as much as had the small, wheeled cart he used to get around.
Still, except for a few old folks with failing eyesight, the man with the cart was the only blind person Mark had known prior to his being blinded in Vietnam. That lack of experience meant he faced the loss of sight with no preconceived opinions about being blind. It wasn’t until two years later, in the spring of ’71, when he reported to a blind rehab center for something called a college prep course, that he began to understand what it meant to be blind. The techniques and tools he learned were interesting, but what surprised him most was the wide variety of people in training. Continue reading
It’s a dog’s life looking out for family.
“Woof.” It’s Twink, actually.
“Woof. Woof.” Watch it, stranger. Don’t go getting familiar. I need to check you out first, give you a good sniffing and…
“C’mon, boy. Come here.”
“Woof. Woof.” What’s with the orders? I don’t think I like your attitude. This is MY neighborhood and I’m a double-hard Jack Russel. So behave or I’ll…
“Come on. Come here, you little…”
“Woof. Woof. Woof.” Right. That’s it. I warned you. Now have some of THIS. Continue reading